”Jag fick inte utnyttja min potential eller liksom växa känslomässigt” – berättelser om att växa upp med en förälder med borderline

Sammanfattning: The aim of this study was to find out how adult children describe their experiences of growing up with a parent with symptoms of borderline personality disorder and how the parent's illness has affected their current life. I have used a qualitative method and conducted four semi-structured interviews with respondents whose parents had symptoms of the diagnosis borderline personality disorder during their childhood. To enable a better understanding and an in-depth interpretation of the descriptions generated by the interviews, I have chosen to analyze my material using John Bowlby's attachment theory, the theoretical concept of mentalization and coping strategies. The results of the study show that parents with borderline personality disorder or symptoms of borderline lead to several negative consequences for their children, the disorder has a major impact on the children's mental health, emotional development and sense of security and predictability. A recurring theme that permeated the respondents' stories was about the parent's inability to talk about feelings and reflect the children's feelings during their upbringing, this is also clarified in the respondents' answers to what consequences their parents' behavior has had on them as adults.